


The Galactic Cosmopolitan magazine

by nyotarules



Category: Star Trek, Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)
Genre: F/M, Humor, Interviews, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-11-10
Updated: 2017-03-20
Packaged: 2018-08-30 05:07:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 415
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8519686
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nyotarules/pseuds/nyotarules
Summary: It is Earth date 2275, the end of the third and final, five year mission for Kirk and his crew. The editor of 'Galactic Cosmo' wants to interview the main crew about their daily lives. They have asked the public to submit questions, so what do people want to know about the famous seven and their friends?





	1. Snoring

Disclaimer – If I could claim Star Trek as my own, I would

**January edition**

**Snoring (verb) – making a snorting or grunting sound while asleep**

**Question 1 – Do you snore when you sleep?**

 

**Lt Pavel Chekov, Chief Navigation officer – Operations division**

'I do not know, but Jaylah believes there are bees in my room at night'

 

**Lt Hikaru Sulu, Second office & Chief Pilot – Command division**

'Ben says I sound like a fog horn when I sleep. That's cos he always wears me out"

 

**Lt Commander Montgomery Scott, Chief Engineer – Engineering division**

"Me! Never! No matter what Charlene tells ye, I sleep like a wee bairn"

 

**Dr Carol Marcus – Chief Tactical officer – Tactical & Security division**

"No, I do not sound like a warp engine, no matter what Kirk says"

 

**Lt Commander Nyota Uhura, Chief of operations – Operations division**

"Yes, who doesn't and my husband likes it, says it helps him to meditate"

 

**Dr Leonard McCoy – Chief Medical officer – Medical division**

"Well, the wife requested Xtreme noise reducer earplugs for her birthday. Says it was a logical present..So what does that tell ya!"

 

**Captain James Kirk – Commanding officer - Command division**

"I'm too busy pleasing my lady to sleep (wink, wink)"

 

**Lt Commander Spock – First Officer & Chief Science officer - Command & Science division**

"I have no comment on the matter."


	2. Sexual intercourse

Disclaimer – If I could claim Star Trek as my own, I would

 

**February edition**

  
**Sexual intercourse (verb) – sexual contact between individuals involving penetration, especially the insertion of genitals into the genitals of a partner(s), typically culminating in orgasm and the ejaculation of semen, especially for humanoid species.**

 

**Question 2 – How often do you have sex?**

**Lt Pavel Chekov, Chief Navigation officer – Operations division**  
'Whenever Jaylah permits it’

 

 **Lt Hikaru Sulu, Second office & Chief Pilot – Command division**  
"This is a bone of contention between me and Ben at the moment, so I better not say”

 

 **Lt Commander Montgomery Scott, Chief Engineer – Engineering division**  
"Every day, if you include kissing"

 

 **Dr Carol Marcus – Chief Tactical officer – Tactical & Security division**  
"I’m married to James Kirk, so take a guess"

 

 **Lt Commander Nyota Uhura, Chief of operations – Operations division**  
"I am married to a Vulcan so have no comment on the matter. But do I look dissatisfied to you?”

 

 **Dr Leonard McCoy – Chief Medical officer – Medical division**  
"Four times a night"

 **Captain James Kirk – Commanding officer - Command division**  
"What did Dr Marcus tell you?”

 **Lt Commander Spock – First Officer & Chief Science officer - Command & Science division**  
"I have no comment on the matter."

**Author's Note:**

> My silly muse is engaged, hopes it wakes up the other muse


End file.
